progress

yesterday
i saw you and i was wearing no makeup,
my hair had hardly been brushed, pulled back in a ponytail
and i was wearing a slightly nicer form of pajamas

but i talked to you, i made you laugh,
i smiled and i did not once compare myself to you.
i did not once degrade myself.
i did not once think about how much i hate myself.
i did not once wish that i didn't exist.

that probably sounds really really trivial and shallow
but for me
it's progress.